Half asleep, my wife looked at the TV and saw Brock Lesnar with his hand raised and the belt around his waist as Bruce Buffer announced him as the UFC’s new heavyweight champion.
“Why doesn’t he have a nickname?” she asked.
He doesn’t need one, I reasoned. “His nickname,” I said, “is Brock Lesnar.”
A man with such an amalgam of size, strength, speed and power has no real use for a sobriquet. Since bursting onto the MMA scene a whopping four fights ago, the former WWE champion has stirred our amazement. Writers have exhausted their banks of adjectives and plunged their metaphorical depths to find new and interesting ways to describe this almost indescribable human being known as Brock Lesnar.
Goliath. Behemoth. Monster. Somehow, those words don’t do the job with this dude.
However, my wife, despite being -- like Lesnar -- a total MMA neophyte, made a good point. Fighters with nicknames vastly outnumber those without. And here was this huge guy, perhaps the biggest cash register in MMA history (Hey, chalk one up for me!), with nothing but a first and last name.
Monikers help give fighters identities, revealing the premier aspect of their styles or personalities. Randy Couture’s intelligence and preparation make it seem like he was born to fight, for example. It wouldn’t be shocking one day if someone sketched his image in a dictionary next to the word “man.” He’s known as “The Natural.”
Should we call Lesnar “The Un-natural”?
After all, his performance in a second-round TKO of Couture on Saturday night reduced this highly complex sport to a simplistic assault in which a 45-year-old man’s wits were no match for a younger man’s astounding gifts.
In the octagon, it’s as if Lensar just says, “I’m very big and I have very big hands. I will hit you with them. May God have mercy on your soul.”
Ever the strategist, Couture seemed to be playing the fight perfectly, to no one’s surprise. He traded blows with Lesnar and wrestled him well despite a 60-pound weight disadvantage. And after a second-round exchange, Lesnar was cut above his eye. It looked like Couture had him flummoxed and primed for exploitation, the very scenario many predicted – or at least hoped – would lead to Lesnar’s downfall.
But, moments later, after a right hand to Couture’s ear, Lesnar was on top of the champion, raining hammer punches like a crazed carpenter in a nail-driving competition. The fight was stopped at 3:07 of the second. The big man ran around, then nearly leaped out of the cage, displaying a little more of his stunning athleticism.